What You Probably Haven't Thought About: Homosexuality

Please read this article from CNS: http://ow.ly/AMGEb

I know this is a touchy subject and most Americans think exactly what I don't, even if we're on the same side about same-sex marriage.

Here's the thing: I'm not homosexual.  Whatever feelings I have felt over the course of time, I have never labeled myself homosexual.  I can't report on the feelings and experiences of those who do claim to be homosexual and I don't mean to try.  But please don't label me homophobic just because I don't think they should get married or make out.  Being attracted to the same sex is not culpable in so far as it is not intentional.  If indeed people are "born this way," of course it is not their fault.  If it's developed later in life, it still isn't their fault necessarily, because it's not a choice.

But mental disorders can also be from birth or be developed later in life.  And homosexuality, like mental disorders, is contrary to how the human being should be.

That's hard to digest, I know.  Autistic children are still children, they are still of God, they are still persons.  God is calling them, despite and because of autism, to something special.  But autism isn't how it's supposed to be.  We strive for a cure for autism, or cleft palate, or conjoined twins, and we celebrate when breakthroughs are made.  Being born a certain way doesn't mean that you're stuck that way.

I know.  If only laws and society would allow gays to function as they wish, homosexuality wouldn't interfere with life and couldn't possibly be considered a disorder, blah, blah, blah.

Procreation is supposed to lead to reproduction – which you'll see is important.  And some scientific findings, which are for some reason on the DL, have supported my convictions about sexual ambiguity.

Look at your body.  Whether it's homosexuality or transvestism, the mind simply does not agree with reality.  Science is evolving, I realize.  As you may have guessed, I disagree with some of the new methods.  But look at the anatomy.  Men are made to be men and procreate with women; women are made to be women and procreate with men.  So what's wrong here: the body or the mind?

Scientific advancements can now solve the challenges that homosexuals and transvestites face but in many cases, apparently, transvestite patients did not find mental peace through this procedure; and "on-demand" progeny are separated from their biological fathers and mothers – which can happen anyway but it's not the ideal, and it's not the sort of act you normally associate with love.

And again, why are we trying to change the body instead of the mind?  Perhaps all you need is a broader understanding and acceptance of femininity or masculinity.

What's more, young children are encouraged to experiment, to consider both sides of the coin.  They don't even know there is a coin before puberty!  What they know is social pressure and embarrassment.  A friend of mine in psychology recently pointed out to me, "At puberty, a lot of kids have questions and doubts.  They get teased by their peers, whereas the gay community is very accepting [by necessity] and so many young people associate themselves with the gay community and think that they are gay because they found acceptance there.  And if they seek counseling, they're going to be encouraged to accept their homosexual feelings, even if those feelings don't really exist in the individual's case."

If you had lost your leg and I commanded you to follow me into the next room, I'd be a horrible tease to expect you to follow my orders.  A person in the midst of a panic attack can't just calm down.

So if you're a man and I forced you to marry a woman even though you were attracted to men, I'd be committing a horrible injustice on both you and your wife.  But I'm not saying that.  I'm saying, your mental reality doesn't correspond with the physical.  Why are we trusting the mental one?  And studies have shown that homosexuality is treatable.

Show me proof that homosexuality is so deeply ingrained in the person that it is who they are, not just something that's going on in the brain.

That's only one shot of homosexuality.  Ethics, morality, and the Catholic Church have other positions from which homosexuality must be considered, for good or ill, but I didn't consider them here.

What You May Already Know: Modesty

[Prerequisite for this article: general Christian principles and belief in the Bible]

Among Christians, the hot topic is modesty.  Many denominations, Christians, and even Catholics have presumed to issue rubrics for girls – "What to Wear, What Not to Wear."  "It's okay to show ankles now, we're sure we don't need to tell you, but… this other area of your body is not appropriate.  Thus sayeth us."

Biblical modesty is a little confusing.  I've yet to find a verse that says, "A glimpse of stocking is something shocking!"  But it does say, "likewise also that women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly attire…."  Even with that "clearly spelled out" in the New Testament, it's not like Christians never wear gold or pearls, nor do up their hair.  Truth is that Paul was making a point in that passage, which was not, "Wear frumpy clothing."  Truth is that the Bible is just not specific about what we're allowed to do with clothing.

Out of curiosity, google "Bible verses about modesty."  You may already be familiar with OpenBible.info – it often comes up when you're looking for verses.  Skimming through the results for "modesty," several verses don't seem to apply.  Ah, but the key to modesty actually lies in those very verses.  Because modesty is not what they say….

Modesty is not covering yourself up.  Modesty is not leaving something to the imagination.  Modesty is not guarding the hearts, eyes, and minds of the opposite sex.  Modesty is not last year's fashions.  Modest is not hottest.

Modesty is honesty – in a way.  Or so Marc from "Bad Catholic" says.  I mean, at least it actually rhymes and makes sense, so give him credit for that, anyway.  I think I do understand his point, even though at times it was hard for me to grasp how he was able to condense modesty down to honesty – but it probably wasn't his objective to condense it down, so anyway….  (He does a great job exploring the topic, I think.  Check it out.)

Here is what I've learned to associate with modesty: dressing to reveal yourself.  I guess that does sound like honesty, doesn't it?  Dressing to reveal who you are as a person.  What this doesn't mean is just, "I'm a human being and I have a body!  Deal with it!  Let's all go nudist!"  But I'm also aiming at not telling you what you must or must not wear, what you can or cannot show.  I think you already know.

Young girls usually have a good sense of modesty (or shyness, if you like), indicating that modesty is probably something natural, and not ingrained in us.  If it was ingrained, women would be more inclined to be modest than children.  But even adult women can probably tell me what is modest and what is not, simply by having a general idea of society and fashion.  Very few people will actually believe that it is good or even okay to be a slut.  So dressing like a slut?  How is anyone supposed to tell the difference?  Dressing like a slut means saying that you're a slut.  And while everyone else has a duty to not treat you as a slut, you have a duty to not be a slut, think like a slut, or dress like a slut.  Just as an example.

When you dress, what are you revealing about yourself?  If what you're revealing is a lot of skin (by today's standards anyway) or undergarments, you're saying something about yourself that isn't true.  (Hopefully you know that it isn't true, but that's a pep talk for another time.)  Certain styles could also be considered immodest, maybe only because of the circumstances.  What do you want to tell people about yourself?  What's the impression you want to make?

The rest of that line from 1 Timothy says, "but with what is proper for women who profess godliness—with good works."

"Likewise also that women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly attire, but with what is proper for women who profess godliness—with good works."

But here are a few more relevant verses:

"Clothe yourselves, all of you, with humility toward one another, for “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.”"  –– Expand your understanding of the definition of modesty:

"Beware of practicing your righteousness before other people in order to be seen by them, for then you will have no reward from your Father who is in heaven."

Modesty is honest, it is humble, it is respectful.  And in that way, modesty includes an element of not tempting others.  There's a small but growing group of Christian people saying that what happens on the boy's end is not the responsibility of the girl.  For example, they rail against, "Ladies, don't wear bikinis because it leads guys to sin."  They are quite right in hating the prevailing notion that guys can't help what they think or do.  If all the women around them are scantily clad, men will not necessarily disrespect these women.  Men can and should control their thoughts and actions.  But don't leave it at that.  

The Bible still says, "Woe to the world for temptations to sin! For it is necessary that temptations come, but woe to the one by whom the temptation comes!"  Whether bikinis are modest or not is, as far as I can see, arguable on both sides; and if a girl does wear a bikini, any man that lusts after her is accountable for his own soul.

BUT.

Ladies, you still need to take into consideration that you may be a temptation.  You by no means need to go to extraordinary means or defy modern fashion in order to save men.  A modest woman can still be the object of lust.  But dress thoughtfully.  If you are a temptation because you're lazy, don't care, or want to look sexy, that reflects on you and you will be held accountable.  You know what excessive cleavage says about you.  You know super short skirts are ultimately embarrassing.  Dress like you demand respect, not like you're looking for a flirt.  There is a difference.

Basically, if you say to yourself, "Ooh yeah, that looks sexy," you'll know you need to throw on a cardigan or something.  Men, if you're dressed, your clothes should be on and properly secured.  You know you know what I'm talking about.

OpenBible.info – verses on modesty

1 Timothy 2:9-10

1 Peter 5:5

Matthew 6:1

Matthew 18:7

10 Books for Summer Reading if You Haven't Read Them Yet

Reading is extremely good for your mind, and so for you.  It's fundamental!  Education is the key to freedom.  Imagination widens the horizons of possibility.  According to Lifehack.org, reading reduces stress, expands the vocabulary, improves memory and concentration, and strengthens analytical thinking skills.  Summer isn't quite over yet, so if there's a good time to start reading again, it's now!

We all know the hardest part is finding a book to read, so I've compiled a list of books you might try.  Mostly, I've picked classics.  Nobody likes to be the person who hasn't read them!  Classics are classics for a reason – they are either very enjoyable, or very thought provoking, or both!  These are in no particular order.  Try a few, and see what strikes you.

1. Sherlock Holmes by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
   
   
   Famed mystery stories by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.  Sherlock Holmes is a private consultant detective and, together with his good friend Dr. Watson, solves many baffling cases.  Holmes has been portrayed in movies and shows many times – even parodied in "The Great Mouse Detective" – and the original stories do not disappoint.  Readers may be surprised and have fun comparing the details they know with the classic tales, and find themselves enlightened to detail.
   
   
2. Wuthering Heights by Emily Brontë
   
   
   You've heard about it, you have seen a movie based on it, but have you read it?  Definitely a book that will not please all readers, but well worth digesting.  Nearly all the characters are of questionable disposition, and a good reader will reflect on human nature.  The almost comedic tragedy of this novel is partly infuriating, partly baffling; in the end, what should have been done?  What could have been done?
   
   Goodreads.com says:
   
   Wuthering Heights is a wild, passionate story of the intense and almost demonic love between Catherine Earnshaw and Heathcliff, a foundling adopted by Catherine's father. After Mr Earnshaw's death, Heathcliff is bullied and humiliated by Catherine's brother Hindley and wrongly believing that his love for Catherine is not reciprocated, leaves Wuthering Heights, only to return years later as a wealthy and polished man. He proceeds to exact a terrible revenge for his former miseries. The action of the story is chaotic and unremittingly violent, but the accomplished handling of a complex structure, the evocative descriptions of the lonely moorland setting and the poetic grandeur of vision combine to make this unique novel a masterpiece of English literature.
   
3. Alice's Adventures in Wonderland by Lewis Carroll
   
   
   That's right!  This is a mere children's book but if you haven't read it, you may be astonished!  It's short and simple, so if you're afraid to commit, try this one on for size.  It is still worth plenty of consideration and reflection.  Critics and academics pour over Carroll's world with confusion, but there is always the possibility that the simplicity of a child's dreamland is all that lies in the pages there.  What is the value for adult readers?  Well, find out.
   
   
   
4. The Chronicles of Narnia by C. S. Lewis
   
   That's right, another children's book.  If you haven't read them, however, they are well worth your time.  The mystical and theological themes in the book just may enchant you.  And even if you object to religion, you can still have a wonderful adventure.  From before the Pevensie children to the end of the kings and queens, these novels will take you on wonderful adventures, in the prose style so many already love.
   
   
   
5. Man's Search for Meaning by Victor Frankl
   
   This short non-fiction book will awaken corners of your heart that have been sleeping far too long.  Victor Frankl had a chance to escape to America with his wife, but chose to remain behind with his parents.  Before it was all over, he had lost all his family, but he may astonish you with his reflections on man and the meaning of life.  Victor Frankl briefly recounts his experiences in concentration camps and then explains his theory, known as logotherapy.  Man needs to strive for something meaningful, he says – it isn't pleasure that will get him through the hard times.  This book is tough to take but could change your life.
   
   
   
6. Jane Austen
   
   Some people really cannot stand Jane Austen, but you have a few novels to choose from.  Pride and Prejudice may be the most popular one and some consider it the most interesting.  Some think Emma is too slow.  Sense and Sensibility is a favorite, and Persuasion has a very satisfying ending.  And of course there are more.  If you have tried to read these before but struggled to get into it, consider listening to the audio book instead and reward yourself with the movie adaptation afterward.
   
   
   
7. Hamlet or Much Ado About Nothing by Shakespeare
   
   Shakespeare stumps many readers as his language is ancient and much of his stage direction is hidden in the lines he gives his characters.  But listening to a dramatized audio version often does the trick, or perhaps watching a really good film adaptation.  Try Hamlet – it's popular for a reason – or Much Ado About Nothing, which is very good fun.  There are many films for both and Kenneth Branagh is a popular choice for the star; however, you might also try the adaptions starring David Tennant.
   
   
   
8. The Hobbit by J. R. R. Tolkien
   
   In this increasingly popular story, a creature called a hobbit and a company of dwarves set on a journey to reclaim a mountain from a dragon and restore it to the rightful heir.  With the movie trilogy soon wrapping up, it would only be fair to read the original tale if you haven't already.  If you have already seen the movies, you may find the novel much more charming and enchanting (and even unfamiliar).  A much gentler read than The Lord of the Rings trilogy, this could easily enchant a child but captures the fascination of any age.
   
   
   
9. The Adventures of Tom Sawyer by Mark Twain
   
   Another simple book but worth the read.  And is it as simple as it appears?  Many of the escapades of Tom Sawyer are humorous, but Twain contrasts Tom and his friends against the lives that the adults spin in anxiety.  Concerns and prejudices of the typical adult are brought into such question that they are fairly scorned, and maybe for good reason.  Mark Twain masterfully weaves the whimsy of his Tom Sawyer stories with the weight of great trouble.  Of course, The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn is another of his great novels.
   
   
   
10. Rebecca by Daphne du Maurier
    
    "Last night I dreamt I went to Manderley again."  Hitchcock directed a film starring Laurence Olivier in 1940 based on this suspenseful novel, and both movie and novel are excellent.  The poor and orphaned heroine meets an older well-off gentleman, and the two fall in love.  She can't believe her good fortune when he asks her to marry him!  But soon the ghost of his mysterious previous wife seems to be haunting their marriage and her life falls apart around her.  Feeling terribly inadequate to fill the late Mrs. de Winter's shoes and antagonized by the housekeeper, she feels increasingly compelled to learn the secret of this woman.  But it is all downhill from there.  Pay close attention and you might notice a special detail about this special character.

Of course there are many, many more good books to be read, but this might help you get started.  If you don't have the time or inclination to sit down and read a book, try audiobooks!  You can check them out at the library or download them on your computer or smartphone, and you can even find free recordings of some books online.

I highly recommend Goodreads.com.*  All of the books in the above list are linked to that site, and once you create an account with your Facebook or email address, you can make a list of books you've read in the past, are currently reading, and would like to read in the future; browse titles; set a reading goal for the year; and more.  It might help you feel organized and get motivated.

Enjoy and digest carefully!

*not a sponsor of this site